***The Rules Of Bedroom Golf!***
1. Each player shall furnish his own equipment for play - normally one club and two balls.
2. Play on a course must be approved by the owner of the hole.
3. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club in the hole and keep the balls out.
4. For most effective play, the club should have a firm shaft.
Course owners are permitted to check shaft stiffness before play begins.
5. Course owners reserve the right to restrict club length to avoid damage to the hole.
6. The object of the game is to take as many strokes as necessary
until the course owner is satisfied that play is complete. Failure to do so may result in being denied permission to play the course again.
7. It is considered bad form to begin playing the hole immediately upon arrival at the course. The experienced player will normally take time to admire the entire course with special attention to well formed bunkers.
8. Players are cautioned not to mention other courses they have played , or are currently playing, to the owner of the course being played. Upset course owners have been known to damage players equipment for this reason.
9. Players are encouraged to bring proper rain gear for their own protection.
10. Players should ensure themselves that their match has been
properly scheduled, particularly when a new course is being played for the first time. Previous players have been known to become irate if they discover someone else playing on what they considered to be a private course.
11. Players should not assume a course is in shape for play at all
times. Some players may be embarrassed if they find the course
to be temporarily under repair. Players are advised to be extremely tactful in this situation. More advanced players will find alternative means of play when this is the case.
12. The course owner is responsible for manicuring and pruning any bush around the hole to allow for improved viewing of,
alignment with, and approach to the hole.
13. Players are advised to obtain the course owners permission
before attempting to play the back nine.
14. Slow play is encouraged. However, players should be prepared to proceed at a quicker pace, at least temporarily, at the course owners request.
15. It is considered outstanding performance, time permitting, to play the same hole several times in one match.That's funny stuff!
Reminds me of this time I was golfing. There I was standing in front of the t-box, it was a lovely view. The kind of view you only see on TV or the internet. I had a few beers back at the clubhouse. But I wasn't too wasted to play this hole. I pulled out my trusty 5 wood. Oops! I mean 9 wood. Gripped the shaft as I prepared to drive it home. I closed my eyes for just a second or two as my body twisted and thrusted forward toward the prize. And just my luck, I missed and went off to the right. I don't know if it was the alcohol or my lack of playing time here lately. But I landed in the rough. And I mean it was rough! I don't think they had landscaped the area for some time. It was very thick and bushy, like the woods behind Grandma's house in the spring. I was too distracted by the mess I was in, and knew I had to rethink my approach. I figured the best way to put it in the hole would be to go at it from the rear. Which I don't mind at all. It always seems like the hole is easier to drive from that angle. So here I go. I position myself just right. I had to raise my left leg just a little to avoid an obstacle. Even though I couldn't actually see the hole from my vantage point, I relied on my past experience and natural instinct. And as sure as a fat baby poots, I got it in! I conquered that hole. I let out a yell & 'air high-fived' myself. I don't think there is any moral to this story, it's not very moral at all. But if at first you don't succeed, try again. That's the best thing about this game. No matter how bad you play, it's still a good time and you can't wait to play again. I love this game! -Jack
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